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My Goodbyes Matter


The following acronym was created by Kelli Boesel, of OC International, which she adapted from RAFT model, by David Pollock (Reconciliation, Affirmation, Farewell, and Think Destination). This is a step-by-step process on saying goodbye well. Explain each step, and write SHIP in big letters on a poster board or whiteboard so the Novas can visualize it as you discuss. Following the lesson, practice each step together. Explain to the Novas that good goodbyes matter so they’re not bad byes. Remind them of that throughout the day.

S- Say sorry

When getting ready to say goodbye, do not leave if there is a relationship that needs to be reconciled. Encourage Novas to privately seek out someone they need to apologize to. When getting ready to say goodbye, do not leave if there is a relationship conflict that needs to be resolved. (Kaleiders share a personal example from the week).

H- Hugs & Hi-5s

This step is meant to be a time of affirmation and thank you’s. Do not leave without telling people how much they meant to you. (This would be a good time to pass out those notes that you Kaleiders wrote for each of them).

I- I’ll see you later

Verbally say goodbye to everyone, and give them a hug. Do not simply wave at the room, say “goodbye”, and then leave. Go up to each of your friends, hug them, and say goodbye.

P- Pack & Plan

Once you have completed the previous three steps, then and only then can you start to think about where you are headed next.

Do NOT disengage until after all the steps have been completed.